


Blessing in Disguise

by LogicalBookThief



Category: Preacher (TV)
Genre: Alcohol, Blood, Cassidy-Centric, Friendship/Love, Gen, Humor, Implied Sexual Content, Language, M/M, a lot of fun in this one actually, bit of a character study
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-14
Updated: 2016-06-14
Packaged: 2018-07-15 01:31:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7200002
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LogicalBookThief/pseuds/LogicalBookThief
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Being a vampire can be fun. Sometimes.</p><p>Wherein Cassidy plans to convince Jesse that his newfound abilities don't have to a be curse while adding a bullet to his own ongoing pros and cons list.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Blessing in Disguise

**Author's Note:**

> I am so weak, and so thirsty for fic, so here we have another one. Dedicated to the awesome itsclydebitches, who writes some great Preacher fic, recently one which I prompted and am SO happy with :)
> 
> Thanks to all the kudos/comments on my first story featuring two losers! And thank you to the new episode for inspiring this.

Ever since discovering his morally ambiguous command over all things with ears, Cassidy could tell Jesse was feelin' less-than-stoked - downright _conflicted_ \- about the frankly staggering possibilities bestowed upon him.

Great power came with great responsibility, sure, and all the rest of that upstanding junk - _except_ not everyone could be a teenager climbin' walls and shootin' webs, Petey, thanks. Some of 'em were preacher's with the power to overrun freewill. Some of 'em were vampires who sustained themselves on the lives of others.

When Cassidy impressed upon his friend that the nature of his ability depended entirely on his perspective, he wasn't just flapping his gums. And it wasn't a platitude to merely settle Jesse's mind, neither. Over the decades, Cassidy had accumulated a long-running mental list of reasons why his condition _sucked,_ balanced by the advantages that came along with it.

 **Pro:** For instance, Cassidy would not have his inhuman alcohol tolerance. He could drink himself pissed from noon 'till midnight, and he'd get on just fine the next day, no poisoning to speak of. Good thing, too, for he'd his first whiff when he was still shiting his pants, Old Granny Cassidy's remedy for a yowling babe's toothache. Ever since, he couldn't keep his sticky fingers away from the stuff, whether nicking rum off the counter while his mum cooked or toasting a pint with his brother in after the Easter Uprising didn't end with them dead or incarcerated (it ended with something quite different for Cass).

 **Con:** Now, Cassidy would never speak ill of liquor, his truest and most faithful love on this earth. Nevertheless, it was difficult to deny that...the temptation of the indulgence abandoned sorta fell flat, when you could have it in excess and never be full. Same went for drugs, too. Not that it stopped him from using either, 'cause Cassidy was a hedonist at heart, and certainly no quitter. Speaking o'...

 **Pro:** Immortality effectively gave him the chance many a man would kill for - in theory, Cass had unlimited time and ample opportunity, to achieve any and all his dreams. Make his ambition a reality.

 **Con:** He had _no_ real ambitions.

 **Pro:** Cassidy was 119-years-old, still kickin', and more importantly, still retaining his youthful looks.

 **Con:** He was 119-years-old, could likely last another century if he stayed out of the sun; and by that logic, he was likely outlive everybody who ever gave a damn about him. On that note-

 **Pro:** Had he never turned, Cassidy was under no delusions of what kind of lot he might've been handed: the same lot as most boys from his ole Irish village. Find a grimy job, drink to forget how much he hated it, complain with the lads about the damn English while they played cards at the pub. Marry a lady, spawn a few sprogs, maybe be the model husband (while having a few trysts on the side) and love his kids but name his firstborn Proinsias II, an act of utmost cruelty. Basically, he could've been a lousy  _bore._

 **Con:** Never returned to his family, after his change. Never heard from 'em again. Dead by this day an' age, obviously, and he could only figure they lived a full, boring lives like the one he described. Or at least, that's what he hoped happened.

 **Pro:** Nobody would be here to help Jesse cope with his new Jedi powers. Padre was no slack, to be fair - however, he had a habit of brooding too much, and for someone trying so hard to get into the spirit of forgiving, he tended to think the worst when it came to himself.

Granted, there were probably more qualified people for the job of guiding through his current predicament, but Cassidy knew a thing or two about curses. And while not the best role model, who better to teach his padawan than an honest-to-God abomination?

 **Con:** Cassidy wanted to do right by his friend, really, he did. But Cassidy was self-serving, selfish, and might possibly offer advice that would benefit both of 'em, rather than looking out for Jesse's best interest alone. Honestly, with his own enemies waitin' around, and his vampire nature an unfortunate fact of everyday life, just sticking around the preacher so much could potentially put him into harm's way.

Cassidy understood this, was not inexperienced enough to plead ignorance, and he simply didn't care. He wanted to be around Jesse. What-ifs be damned.

 **Pro:** Staying up all night came in handy; all the best parties happened after dusk.

 **Con:** Sunburns were killer.  

 **Pro** : Giving those self-righteous, fanatical vampire hunters a lesson in murder every damn time they tracked him down left him with a wicked sense of satisfaction.

 **Con:** If not for him being a vampire, they wouldn't be after him in the first place.

 **Pro:** Cassidy might never have seen Star Wars trilogy.

 **Con:** Cassidy might never have seen the Star Wars prequels.

Fuck Jar Jar Binks, that miserable twat.

 **Pro:** Cassidy would have never been suckered (heh, more like _ordered,_ Jesse unfairly using that command of his, smirking the whole time, the smug bastard) into watchin' Emily's three kiddies for a couple hours. Rabid animals more like, askin' if he were a Leprechaun because of his accent, bloody hell, was that all that they thought Ireland was, an isle of midgets shootin' rainbows outta their arses?

Then chasing him around, callin' him "Slender Man," whatever the fuck that meant, and shrieking ear-splitting murder when Cassidy had had enough, caught 'em round the ankles and hung 'em upside down. Little bastards weren't even afraid, just loud and obnoxious, giggling as he shook 'em, hoping spare change to fall out.

 **Con:** _Okay,_ that one of the lot, the lass, she was alright. They went out for lunch, because damn if he was gonna feed three tykes (also, pretty sure kids didn't survive off liquor like he did, although that would've made his job bearable). All the girl wanted was a bowl of cereal. She asked if he liked Lucky Charms, to which he thought, _Fuck ye stereotype, irreverent lil' shite._ Aloud, he grunted, "No, I'm more a _Count Chocula_ fan."

Her eyes widened, and that girl, swear to the Almight and above, leaned close to him and whispered, "Are you _a vampire?"_ Cass laughed so hard he nearly shite himself. Out of the mouths of babes. The fucking four-year-old caught on faster than Jesse or her mum.

And that boy, the tinier of the two, had a mean hook for a little guy. He complained that his big brother was beating on him, and having been on that end of siblinghood 'fore, Cass advised him to, "stop bothering me 'bout it and sock him already, geez!" and the lad followed through marvelously.

Later, Jesse gave him the parent-approved version of "turn the other cheek" yada yada, the usual bologna nonsense, though Cassidy suspected that it was _do as I say, not as I do_ situation for the preacher man.

 **Pro:** Being a vampire made him, er, aware of certain biological functions - let's say, made him fairly attuned to the rush of blood through the veins, the places from which that blood spewed most violently when cut, and the places to which that blood traveled to when excited. This came in handy during intimates encounters, and don't think that Cassidy hadn't taken advantage.

It also, however, could make sex somewhat of a tightrope. Jesse had a lovely neck, creepy as that sounded. Look, when you have to gorge yourself on the occasional throat in order to survive, you tend to notice the curve of a person's collar, that vein that pulses with each beat, same one that bounces in time to your thrusts, wobbling with every cry of pain and ecstasy.

 **Con:** Being so viscerally aware of his lovely neck posed a bit of problem, should Cassidy allow himself to get carried away, as on one memorable occasion. He was nipping the skin, knew what it did to Jesse when he trailed his way, and the preacher was being nothing but encouraging, practically singin' his praises. The urge to use his teeth snuck up without him warning, instinctive as breathing, and he bit, _hard,_ too hard. Broke skin, and the barest taste of blood flooded his tongue. And he _moaned,_ sunk in deeper - it was awful, a fright to the system, but at the same time _so good,_ and with his disgust came an orgasm so sweet he saw stars. He had to tear himself away immediately after, for fear of not being able to if he lingered.

Didn't help matters none that Jesse arched into the bite, very much on-board, only to be frustrated when Cass finished early. A swift, savory handjob shushed him, and they passed the rest of the night without incident. Next day, Cass failed to miss the hint of a hickey peeking from the preacher's collar, boy did it make him hot under his own. And  _damn_ if he didn't hope the rest of the congregation spotted it, too.

 **Pro:** Odds are, without becoming a vampire, Cassidy would have never even met Jesse Custer.

 **Con:** ...

And he could have made the point that, without making Jesse's acquaintance, Cassidy would not be in the mess of trouble he was. For Christ's sake, he had his own worries and woes to sort out, completely unrelated to the shite-storm looming over Annville, and he had gone and added a portion of his friend's burden over to his pile, out of the kindness of his heart (and the lust of his loins).

He could have mentioned how Jesse Custer was a dangerous contradiction, with a smile that was stupid and lopsided, belying the innocence of a decent man in a corrupted world, somehow managing to retain a spark goodness that warmed the hearts of saints and made sinners want to do better; but if you drew your gaze up further, you would see those dark eyes glistening with mischief, intent and cunning that was in short supply in this state, and you wouldn't doubt his ability to lay you flat if you failed to repent.

Perhaps the most incriminating bullet of all was that Cassidy was hopelessly, hooked on the man already.

Quite a quandary, when considering the other irrefutable facts of the equation: Cass would have to cut town eventually. Cass' true nature would be revealed, and as forthcoming as he'd been about the subject, Jesse had yet to believe him, and something told him the moment the truth hit would be a shock to the system. Plus, no tellin' whether his forgiveness extended - which was no surprise, and over the years, had ceased to truly bother Cassidy. _Now,_ though, now it did. Now Cassidy wasn't sure he could stand an outright rejection.

But you know what? To hell with it. Some curses were worth the few rewards sprinkled into the mix.

If he could convince himself of that, it should be a cinch to convince Jess.

**Author's Note:**

> Might as well have been titled, "Cass Loves Jesse So All His Other Cons Are Null."


End file.
